1. i've come to the conclusion that there is a difference between honoring and obeying one's parents. God commands us to honor, it is assumed for life. but the command to obey was directed at children. when you're a child, honor and obedience mean practically the same thing. but there comes a time in life when that changes... there's more to be said on that but i'll tread with caution.

2. i've been looking for an apartment to rent in toronto. i've never had to look for a place to stay before so this is new for me. if anyone has advice, i'm all ears. i've been looking for fully furnished spaces but i'm wondering if i'd be wasting money going that route. getting a non-furnished space and buying the basics will probably be more economical in the long run. i still don't know if i have permission to move but i think it's time for me to step out on my own.

3. looks like we're heading to north carolina to visit friends for thanksgiving. haven't seen davina, paulina and the family in a long time, so it should be fun.

4. still waiting...

UPDATE: the wednesday night service today was really good. i wasn't really even in the mood to go today, but i had to play guitar so i dragged myself over. but God is so awesome! the message was on faith and i felt like mine was given a much needed boost.

when the israelites were waiting on the other side of the jordan, waiting to cross and take the promised land, God told the priests to lead out into the river which was running at flood levels. and we know that as soon as the priests' foot entered the water, it split and the people crossed on dry land. but imagine what it must have been like just before the miracle. they could've just waited it out on the side for God to part the river. they could've said, "well, God if it's your will, then part the river and we will cross." but that isn't how it went. they knew they were supposed to cross to the other side even though they had no idea how it would happen.

they took God at His Word and started moving. and after they started moving, God worked a miracle on their behalf. it was ridiculous to jump into the flooding river, it was an all or nothing situation. there were only two possible outcomes, either God works a miracle or they're screwed. but it was their step of ridiculous faith and doing what God had told them to do that God honored in the end. and pastor tim also mentioned that many times, the desires you have in your heart, sometimes you feel silly because they seems so ridiculous, but it's just God setting you up for another miracle.

i know i have some ideas that God has put in my mind. ideas that seem completely stupid to most. but you know what, i want to believe God for impossible things. why? because it leaves room for God to work wonders. i'm not saying that i want to be foolish. but i do have desires in my heart that i believe originated in the heart of God Himself. and so...Lord, i am in 100%. totally committed to see this thing through. work your miracles in me, around me, and through me. and let Your name be glorified in my life. amen!

Benita Joy