Just when i start to think my life is useless, meaningless, stationary, dull and anything else uneventful, God comes close... puts his hands on my shoulders.... and gives me a good shake- asking me "what are you doing??? wake up!!!"

for the past week, a friend of my mom's and a powerful woman of God, stayed with us, prayed with us, cried with us, and helped us get a new strength from God. i can't say what i want to say in coherent sentences so i'll say it in my here's-what'-i'm-thinking way of writing:

-i knew there was a spiritual battle going on in vancouver, but not being able to see it makes it hard to believe, but this week i felt it, i felt the urgency for us Christians to put on the armour of God and face the spiritual realm. if you look back in the Bible the hellish forces that made their presence in the world got worse as the generations went on, the last position deployed to fight on this earth is held by Beelzebub, think about it, he's next in command to Satan.

That was in Jesus' time, if that was then, think about the now, and think about what we're doing as Christians to counter this force, these forces. we need to be prepared, we need to be renewed in God, we need to play an active role in Spiritual Warfare.
10Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. 11Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes. 12For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. 13Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. (Ephesians 6:10-13)

-i was aggravated a few weeks ago, i don't know why, and i couldn't exactly put my finger on it, but i complained, whined, worried, thought things i shouldn't have, said things i definitely should not have said, and it all came back and hit me hard. i learned idle words are useless, not only that, they are footholds for other things, "anger malice strife..." and i realized, i don't need those things in my life- so here i go, trying to "put on a new man"- it'll be a journey, luckily i have brothers and sisters whom

3I thank my God every time I remember you. 4In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy 5because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, 6being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.
7It is right for me to feel this way about all of you, since I have you in my heart; for whether I am in chains or defending and confirming the gospel, all of you share in God's grace with me. 8God can testify how I long for all of you with the affection of Christ Jesus.

-for a while i thought, if i can't worship God the way i want to i'll put it off till i can- my parents are quick to say no if there's a youth event out of town or a convention that comes up in the middle of classes. but this week i learned, after much repetition, a relationship with God starts with myself, inside, alone, just me and God. "time alone with God" isnt' just a catchy phrase used in the Church circle, it's an essential part of Christian life, and essential part of growing closer to God.

- all this time i thought "being a part of this world" meant spending all your time partying, drinking, looking forward to things only in the future of this world, and generally just "not going to church"- now that i see it written down (what it is that i was thinking), it sounds like i hit myself with a stupid stick. not being a part of this world means... seeking God first and foremost in everything... having to ask yourself, "if i do this will it benefit me?... will it benefit God?... will i grow spiritually from doing this?".

sure i ask myself these questions when it comes to big things like going to a club, or getting drunk, or committing murder, but i never thought the small things mattered, until now, stuff like saying negative things about another person, getting angry, "checking out" guys, laughing at stupid and vulgar jokes... a few things can really add up. living a christian life is hard, some times i wish i was on the isle of Patmos away from everything tempting- but i hear it was hard times even there!

- God's given me a renewed passion for youth ministries, i can't wait till Deeper Walk, Campus Fire, Warfare Prayer, No Boundaries, Generation Unleashed, History Maker.... i want to, and i'm going to be a harvester, prayer person, and what ever else it takes to... reclaim a generation for righteous revolution.