IRONICALLY,  the very thing keeping most single women from getting a man to pop the question is the fact that they're 'single' women.

That is to say, the fact that they're thinking like single women, as opposed to their married counterparts, according to Christine Pembleton in her debut book 'Lord, I'm Ready to be a Wife' (Josephine Communications, June 2009).

"The 'single woman' is someone who has her own purpose--like a career or ministry--and it's something that she can do by herself," said Pembleton, who took her wedding vows nearly four years ago. "She doesn't really have time for a relationship and, if she does, it's not her priority because she's so wrapped up in doing her own thing."

Pembleton said she's not knocking women for pursuing their professional and personal goals. In fact, Pembleton - who is a minister, Internet radio talk show host, and an IT industry professional - encourages it. However, she is convinced that inflexibility and overly unilateral thinking has prevented many potentially fabulous wives and mothers from catching the eye of Mr. Right.

"The problem with the 'single woman' is that she is not willing to let go of her thing to focus on our thing," she said. "Working on 'our' thing is precisely what marriage is all about. So single women sometimes make it hard for men to see them as wife material."

'Lord, I'm Ready to be a Wife' challenges unmarried women to examine the reasons why they want to be married, the attributes of a wife, what they should be looking for in a potential mate, and even a few long-held traditions and rules about dating, such as the ever-popular 'list.'

"This book will help the single woman get out of her own way, so that the right man--a good, godly man - will recognize her as his wife when he sees her," said Pembleton. "It will definitely equip and empower every woman to be the very best that God has created her to be, while she waits for the man who will make her his queen."

The Christian Messenger