God why? Why is it so?
- By Ashish Joy
- Published 01/6/2006
Ashish Joy is a 22 years old Malayalee Christian. He is a Theology Major at Portland Bible College in Oregon State, USA. Ashish Joy is a musician, a writer and enjoys computers. Above all, he loves God with devoted passion and desires to see Christians rise up to become world-changers and trend-setters in the ministry and in the marketplace.
God I'm sick of my spiritual apathy right now. I claim to love you, but I don't have a passion for You. My heart is such disarray. I've wandered and tasted what the world has to offer, and at times I find myself wandering still. I'm so sick of not being able to change society for you. It seems that the Christian ideal, remains just a passion to rise high and mighty in the church, and not affect the masses of unregenerate that roam our communities. How can I reach them Father? How can I be the light that shines brightest in the dark?
Society moves farther away from you daily. People are entities, and as impersonal as they come. I am tired of not being able to connect with them on a deeper level. Give me a revelation of how I can reach this postmodern generation. Schools tyranically teach humanism that breeds relativism, which in turn dilutes our views of absolutes. God how can this world see you? It seems the world can't see you through the vehicles used by the church today. Science has moved further and further away from you. In this day and age, the great Christian minds become philosophers and scientists, but fail to use their pedestal to catalyze change. I am sick and tired of Christianity and its relation to culture, society, philosophy, art, & science. Our culture has lost that God-centered core that made it great.
Why is it that my heart doesn't beat for the children who are killed before they take their first breath? Why is it that my soul does not cry for the countless see of youth who are deceived by the sensuality of this culture? Why is it that I am blind to the ever-changing ocean of filth that consumes the hearts of men and women in the world? There is no difference between this culture and a third-world culture. In the Western culture we make ourselves believe we value human life and the human mind. We have lost all sanity, and the church is travelling all too keenly on that road as well.
God why? Why is it so? Why does it seem like none take action? Why have you allowed me to see such things? Why in your thought, have you let me see the things that sting me so? I say it would have been better for me to not have seen them, than go through the agony of such a realisation.
God break me. Take my all, and shake me from the core. Cut me down that I might grow solely on You. Lord my heart remains in your hand, because I know that my life is but a vapor before Your throne. God change me that I might be one that wholeheartedly follows your plan. Transform me that I might think more like You. God let me not be comfortable in this culture, for their is a judgement prepared for the sins committed. Grant me the grace to follow Your will and run with Your thoughts. In your grace, may I not be an echo but a voice, expounding clearly your divine thought.
God I pray for a revival that starts in the hearts of individuals, that work into the church and change society. I do not pray only for church revivals, rather I humbly desire a social and national revival. I pray for a revival that breaks the nations. God bring us down that we might recognize that need for You. Humble us that we might worship You. Scare us, that we might be the hands and feet we ought to be for You. God let me not be afraid of man or tactics used by this sinful generation. Grant me the grace to pray, and dwell securely within Your hand. Set me apart that I migh fulfill Your mandate, and humble me enough that I might only rely on You.
This is my desire God….not mine alone…but Thy will as well O God. Take this broken life and make it an offering poured out dreadfully on this world. I am thine O God - your servant - and you remain my King.