Thinking Out Loud
- By Benita Joy
- Published 06/4/2008
Benita Joy is a Malayalee Christian and serves as the Chief Editor for South Asian Connection. She is a woman of faith, gifted in the area of leadership and administration, and has a heart for world missions. Her desire is to live a life that is pure and to serve God's purposes in her generation. Benita is pursuing a double major in English and Psychology at the University of British Columbia. She loves big cities, chai, the internet, roller coasters, international cuisines, music, and hanging out with friends. She is the youngest member of Team SAC, plays guitar with a baby pink pick (Yikes!), and she's not much taller than your average dwarf (don't tell her that).
It's been a funny kind of season for me.
On one hand, I'm having an amazing time serving the Lord and throwing myself fully into missions and ministry. And I'm happy! Truly happy! Even though things are sometimes difficult and adjusting isn't always easy, I have never been happier. Serving in Goa was such a blessing! I loved being busy and being with the children and going about my Heavenly Father's business.
On the other hand, there are several different issues that do worry me to some extent such as marriage, the future, career and everything everyone else seems to think is oh-so-important. But the thing is, I'm perfectly content to leave those burdens at the feet of Jesus and take up the cross that He has called me carry and move forward in His strength.
Why is it that those things which I have laid down and given to the Lord in prayer, others feel the need to pick back up and shove in my face? Does the Bible not say that if we seek His Kingdom first, then everything else will fall into place? So then why the hundred and one questions about my plans for the future?
I have given my life, my heart, my body, my mind, my marriage, my future, everything that is me and in me, to Him. A servant doesn't decide anything for himself, he only waits for the instruction and then follows to the best of his ability. My life belongs to Christ; it is owned by Him; He decides. He has brought me this far and I have no regrets!
Why shouldn't I continue to trust Him completely? I know that He will lead me one step at a time, revealing just enough in order that I might move forward in faith.